Just because you think you’re right, doesn’t mean I’m wrong.
Don’t judge me because you believe in religion and I believe in science. Just because you believe in God, doesn’t mean that I’m wrong for believing that our existence could stem from intelligent beings that are extraterrestrial. Because guess what, to someone, we are both crazy for believing in something we can’t see, nor prove. We solely based our beliefs on our own opinions of what is real to us.
Don’t judge me because I like my space, and you like to be social. I don’t have a lot of friends and sometimes I would rather stay home than party. To you, I’m lame. But it’s my preference, and I choose to do what makes me happy. Isn’t that the goal for both of us? If you like to go out and have drinks with your friends every weekend, that does not mean you’re immature, and it does not define you as a party person. It simply means you do what makes you happy. Kudos to you, but don’t degrade me because I would rather be in bed sleeping.
Don’t judge me because I wear sweats to the grocery store and you wear heels. You could say I should try harder with my appearance, or I could say that you try too hard and the houseware aisle of Wal-Mart is not a runway. I wear what makes me comfortable and you wear what makes you feel confident, what’s the problem with either? I’ll wait… Either way, we wear what we like. Do you see the pattern here? You see where I’m going with this?
Don’t judge me based off of what you heard, just because the source is your trustworthy friend. We choose our friends wisely because we love who they are and trust them, right? Sometimes, friends will gossip because, well, there’s something to talk about. Just because something came from your friends mouth, doesn’t mean your friend is right, and if my friend we’re to speak on you, that wouldn’t make them right either. We should stop judging people based of off other people’s opinion. It’s an ugly habit, and I’m guilty, but the fact of the matter is: it’s wrong. It’s totally fucked up, and rumors can really hurt. We are all entitled to our own opinions, but don’t judge just because your friend does. Having a mind of your own is cuter and it makes you less of an asshole. God, did that sound judgey? That sounded a little judgey. Oops.
Don’t judge me because we grew up from different backgrounds. I didn’t come from a rich family, and having went to a private Catholic school and dealing with getting kicked out because my mom could no longer afford it, I always felt a sense of embarrassment and shame. I couldn’t get things all the other kids bragged about. Hell, I couldn’t even get to basketball practice because my mom didn’t even own a car. I never had friends over. My first boyfriend’s parents picked me up at my neighbors house, because I was too embarrassed to be picked up infront my own. My mom’s wealth caused me to be ashamed and I never felt good enough. It took me a while to realize that it had nothing to do with her wealth, but more so who I was deep down. I wanted everyone to accept me and to not be known as the ‘poor girl’, when instead I should’ve focused on how to make people look past that and like me for me, because that’s what real friends do. But because I dealt with a lot of mean people, a lot of people couldn’t look past the fact that I didn’t meet their standards, and I was bullied because of where I lived. I admit, sometimes I feel ashamed that I don’t have my nails and eyebrows done and can’t afford some of the finer things. Society and social media holds high standards, especially when it comes to women. We’re supposed to be bosses with our shit together and expected to look flawless 24/7 but I’ve come to accept the fact I’m not perfect, not even close. So don’t judge me because I may not look as good as you. Don’t judge me because of where I came from, because wealth and good looks don’t define a person’s soul.
Don’t judge me because I formula feed, just because you breastfeed. I can’t emphasize the importance of this one. Yes, I formula feed. The guilt and shame of not breastfeeding is real, and it’s beyond fucked up that genuiley good mothers are put to shame because of their choices. I use to breastfeed. The bonding was beautiful, and knowing that my baby girl was healthy and ultimately fed because of me was tremendously rewarding but with every pro there is a con. I didn’t have the support I needed, and I often times felt more discouraged than proud. Pressure got to me, what can I say? I would never put down a breastfeeding mother, because as mothers we have a right to choose. I think we can all agree, fed is best. I would never judge you for a choice that does not affect my child. It’s saddening to see so many mothers publicly bashing and judging other mothers for choices that will never effect them, or their child(ren). I cringe at people’s comments and judgemental opinions regarding mothers and their choices and lifestyle. If you are not a mother, than you simply can’t imagine the pain and hurt we feel when being judged, when half the time we don’t feel good enough as it is. We carry our babies for 9 months, which often feels like eternity. We give life to our babies, all to be critqued and critisized? I recently saw a post where a woman was bashed for having had a C-section, and was told that it was wrong for her to call herself a mother because she didn’t give birth “naturally” aka, vaginally. I was disgusted, appauled, and hurt for the victim who instead of feeling the joy of motherhood, was judged for the deliverance of her baby. I mean, how cruel is it to try and take the happiness from a new mother? I could not only sympathize, I could relate because I myself had a C-section. It was not easy, it was not pain-free. It was terrifying and intense to say the least, and I felt love just like every mother does. We’re all doing the best we can. What’s the sense in spending our time judging other moms, when we could be spending our time trying improve ourselves as mothers and women? Think about it, before you judge.
Don’t judge me because I don’t post my entire relationship on social media, just because your boyfriend shows you off. All boyfriends should be proud to have a strong, sexy woman by his side. But just because my boyfriend doesn’t post pictures of us, does that mean he is not happy or ashamed of me? I don’t think so. We go on dates, we have nice dinners, we share hilarious conversations and inside jokes. It is a mutual decision for us to keep our relationship private, but it certainly does not mean we’re not proud of one another. We show each other off differently than you and just because your boyfriend shares adorable pics of you and constantly posts paragraphs progressing his love, that doesn’t mean it’s obnoxious or your love is conceded. It’s cute, no doubt. The thing is, no love is the same. Just because it isn’t seen or documented, doesn’t mean it isn’t real. And just because it is posted and liked, doesn’t make it perfect. There are ups and downs that aren’t always shared, and there’s some people who like to vent about both. There is no problem with either.
Don’t judge me because I dropped out, and you graduated. You did the one thing I will always regret not following through with. You probably made your family and friends proud. You may or may not have went to college after high school. You may have pursued your dreams, maybe you’re still in school and hold down a job. You deserve all the credit, really. Successful people do deserve praise. But does that mean that I should be looked down on? That I’m not as intelligent and goal oriented as you? I don’t believe so. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve given up when things got too hard. I don’t want to believe that’s who I am, so everyday I’m trying to be better – in every aspect of my life. Granted, I may not be as successful without a diploma because that piece of paper is more proof of success than a dropout with nothing to show for, but that doesn’t mean I’m good for nothing. Don’t judge me because of my poor choices. I’m only human. Heavily flawed, full of mistakes, but I’m trying. And I believe that counts for something, for everybody. We are more than the diplomas we’re given and in my case, not given. We are more than GPAs. Sadly, the world doesn’t care. To the world; to employers we are only worth what’s on a piece of paper. That’s how we’re identified from birth. We receive a certificate. If we didn’t have one, there would be very little proof to show we are who we say we are. I get that. But papers don’t tell our full story, who we are and how we treat others tells everything. So, don’t judge me because I didn’t get as far you. Just because I didn’t graduate, does not mean I’m a unmotivated person with no potential and just because you graduated does not mean you will go farther in life. We are all chasing the same dream, to be happy.
Just. Don’t. Judge.